My world has been turned upside down. One year ago, life was perfect. I loved where I lived, my job, my steady boyfriend, etc. For the first time in my life, I was completely independent, supporting myself. It felt good to be on my own and not just surviving, but thriving!!

At the beginning of this month, in one short week, my boyfriend of 5 years dumped me and my sister committed suicide. I did not lose all of my reason for happiness, but those two blows were enough to make me feel lost, like I am suddenly left without a compass.

Six years ago, I was a senior in high school and had not yet been accepted to college. I did not know where I would be in the fall, and I was scared of the unknown. I don’t even know how I came to it, but I decided to journey to the Grand Canyon, hike and camp alone for two nights. It was, of course, a life-changing experience.

I feel the same need for this now: a journey of epic proportions, a life-changing quest to search for the path, to look at my compass and find direction. I have not figured out what this epic journey will be, but here are some romantic possibilities:
- Motor-cycle across the country
- Travel to Paris and learn how to love
- Trek to Tibet and study Buddhism
- Move to Australia for a year

As I sink back to reality this week, I am unsure how feasible these things are. I know that it doesn’t really matter, because this is bigger than some job, but at the same time, I have grown accustomed to my quality of life. I hope I decide soon, because I feel like a ship without a bearing.